Week 5 Reading Response 2

Deborah Tannen knows a thing or two about interpersonal communication. She is a sociolinguist at Georgetown University and is author of several bestselling personal communication books. Deborah knows that communication between people and just because there is a strong bond shared between two people doesn't mean that the communication will be any easier, in fact as she describes in "Can we talk?" an essay about difficulties in communication between mothers and daughters sometimes that bond can lead to more complex and emotional forms of understanding which transcend mere speech. Tannen explains much of this complex behavior through excerpts of conversations between mothers and daughters, then she analyzes what was actually said and then the intent. She reinforces the idea that as people are unable to be direct with each other at times their true meanings tend to disappear into subtle meanings and hidden connotation. Tannen explains this due to the duality of being a mother, the ability to watch your daughter grow and experience the trials and tribulations she herself had, as well as the motherly instinct to protect her daughter from making those same mistakes or rather the need to shelter them from harsh experiences in their own pasts. It's definitely a delicate balance. I believe that this is true for all close relationships between any mentor or parent and child. Tannen examines the mother daughter relationship most explicitly because she feels most connected to that particular dynamic. I do not believe that this dynamic is any less intimate between mother and son or father and daughter; however the shared experiences due to physiological differences and social discrepancies between male and female may let parents of the same sex bond more easily with offspring of the same gender.